I.T. BooBoos

During a press conference:

Vendor: We will be very aggressive in delivering the needs of SME. We have a unique offering and we will provide SME quality products and services.
Reporter: What is your definition of SME?
Vendor: SME? Small and Medium Enterprise.

CORRECT! Or maybe Some More Experience in dealing with the press.

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During a press conference:

Vendor : Difficult to use and non-habitual/practice are just some of the reasons why people don’t do this procedure. Our product will solve this.
Vendor : Our product is so easy to use. Literally a plug and play thing. Blah Blah Blah.
Reporter: So how did you solve the reasons?
Vendor : Our product is very user friendly.
Reporter: Yes, you solved the first issue, how about the non-habitual/practice thing?
Vendor : Well, all you have to do is to plug our product and it will do the rest.
Reporter: What if I didn’t plug it? Then your product is useless right?
Vendor : Yes.
Reporter: So you didn’t solve the problem. You simply provided a product.
Vendor : MMM… YES.
Reporter: So how do you address the issue then?
Vendor : I have to check. Let me get back to you on that one.

Go check before it’s too late. Goodluck!

*****

During an event:

Reporter: May I ask what contingency plans or procedures have you put in place to make sure that your consumers will get your continued and uninterrupted service?
Company: We have invested a lot of money to make sure that our service will be uninterrupted. Customer satisfaction is very important to us.

During the demo, the service didn’t work.

Reporter : May I ask why it didn’t work?
Company: I don’t know either. I will call headquarters. Excuse me for awhile.

(You’re excused. How unlucky can you be.)

*****

During an event:

Company Staff: Our software offering will help manage your critical data and will even help locate duplicate or redundant data thus saving valuable storage space for users. Not only that, our application can help speed up searches, organize data, secure them and create backup copies to ensure the integrity and availability of data.

Company Staff: Before I end my presentation, I would like to show you another slide which will announce our company event. Wait let me just look for it. (The staff run his/her presentation from beginning to end)

Company Staff: I think I stored it it my other laptop.

(Search? Organize? Secure? Backup? I rest my case)

*****

During an event

MarComm Staff: Hello Sir, Am glad you can make it to our event.
Reporter : We’ll for as long as my schedule permits me, I make it a point to attend your event.
MarComm Staff: We appreciate that Sir. Am glad you also got my invite through SMS.
Reporter : I didn’t receive any SMS invite from you.
Marcomm Staff: I personally sent it Sir (got his/her mobilephone and showed the reporter the sent SMS invite).
Reporter : No wonder I didn’t receive your SMS invite.
MarComm Staff: Why Sir?
Reporter : Because that is not my mobile number.
MarComm Staff: Ohh

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An incident between a PR and reporter

PR: I will send the company jacket to your office.
Reporter: Thank you.

After a few days, PR and reporter met again…

PR: Unfortunately, the company didn’t create any jacket for the said product. We’re so sorry.
Reporter: That’s OK.

Then another reporter walk by the PR and reporter wearing a jacket with the company product…

PR: I am really sorry…

Tough Luck… Bad Luck… Lady Pinochio

A company inviting (through SMS) a reporter to a press conference:

Company : Hi, just want to confirm if you’re attending our event.
Reporter: What event?
Company : Sent you an invitation via email.
Reporter: Did not receive any invitation.
Company : OK. Will resend it. What is your email address?

( DUH!!! )

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Another invitation through Text Messaging:

PR : May I invite you to the launch of (Company Event) in Makati. Company officials will speak at the event. Hope to see you there. Thanks.

( See you where? The place? The time? )

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Another invitation through Text Messaging:

PR : Hi, How are you my dear and sweet friend? It’s been a long time. Just want to remind you of our event tomorrow. Hope to see you because I miss you a lot. Thanks.
Reporter : Who are you?
PR : Oh, I forgot to introduce myself. I am ……

( My dear and sweet friend huh? )

—–

Another invitation through Text Messaging:

PR : Hello, Don’t forget our event today. We promise you it’s going to be a funfilled day. Wonderful people, wonderful prizes and wonderful entertainment. See you.

( How about the WONDERFUL products and services? )

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During a product presentation:

Company: Yes we have a superb product and we are proud of our business subscription model. You get quality support if you subscribe to our services. The beauty of it is if you don’t pay, we automatically cut-off your services and your product will be useless. Beautiful isn’t it?

( Are you sure it’s Beauty and not the Beast? )

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During a product launch:

Company : We are proud to say that our company is that first to offer such product.
Reporter : What happens if I accidently drop the product? Can it withstand the shock?
Company : Let me get back to you on that. I have to ask our HQ in (another country).
Reporter : OK. How about security? How secure is the product?
Company : That’s a good question. But I have to ask our HQ again on that.
Reporter : OK. How about the wear and tear of the product? Will quality suffer?
Company : Can you write down your questions so that I can refer it to HQ?

( Nevermind, I’ll just go to your HeadQuarters. )

—–

Another product launch:

Company : I am proud to say that our new offering beats the competition. We are number 1 in all aspect. We are new in the market but the chart will show that our product is the best.
Reporter : Who made the study?
Company : Of course, our company did the study.

( No wonder you’re number 1. )

—–

Another product launch:

Company : Our new product will enable companies to save a lot of money. They only pay for what they need and for what they’re going to use.
Reporter : So how much is the product?
Company : It’s a secret for now. No one knows the price except us.

( Really? So secretive. )

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